Oh my god. My hands are shaking. Butterflies are churning so fast in my stomach that I can't eat or sleep. All I can think about is him. I need to pinch myself every so often to make sure I'm not dreaming. But i'm not. This is real. This is actually happening to me. Maybe I shouldn't get my hopes up, but that's all I do all the time. I hope this is for real.
There's this one boy that I've noticed around school. I've been wanting to meet him and get to know him because he's cute and seems like just my type. I don't have any classes with him so there hasn't been a way to take that first step, until now. When Kristin met Jon and introduced him to the group, this boy came with them. Turns out they're friends and his name is Kyle. So he started hanging out with us and I got to know him a little better. Yesterday I spent the whole evening with him. I was hanging out with Kristin and I thought Jon wasn't coming but then she mentioned that they were both coming and it made me giddy with excitement. I had the whole night planned out: sit beside him at Kristin's, casually walk beside him and sit beside him at dinner. I was going to make him notice me, but instead he walked beside me and sat beside me. I thought that was the happiest I'd be all night until Jon blurted out:
My stomach dropped, and it's still there. Do you know how that feels? When someone you've been wanting wants you too? Right now I just feel so beautiful because someone likes me. I haven't been able to sleep since Jon told me. All I can think about was if this is actually going to happen. Part of me still feels like it won't but that's only because of all the heartbreak Terry caused me. I keep wondering if Kyle could take that away, make me feel whole again.
I close my locker the next day at school, my head pounding from my lack of sleep. When I spin around in the hall, I spot him walking towards me. My stomach does a topsy turvy and I squeeze my books against my stomach to try and stop it. He smiles as he reaches me and I give him a huge one back.
"Hey, Jen."
"Hey, what's up?"
"Well," he throws his hands into his pockets and tries to meet my eyes. "I was just wondering if you, maybe, wanted to be my girlfriend?"
Just like that. He's blushing and I'm blushing and instead of turning into a big pink ballon I say "yes" and he hugs me and suddenly everything is good. If I'm dreaming I don't want to wake up.
When I get home from school, we meet up online and start chatting. We talk for hours and plan a date for Saturday night. The whole time we're flirting and everything about it just seems right.
Me: jump you, naw jokez, i dunno, u tell me...
Him: Dang i was hoping u would lol...
Me: u know u like it...
Him: I do, so u looking forward to saturday?...
Me: yup, except it's really far away...
Him: I know, thats gonna be a loooong work day,its funny today ive done nothing but think of u and its put me
in the greatest mood
My stomach has been a wreck for days but when he rubs it I feel better. When he holds me in his arms, the feeling goes away. I have a boyfriend. My first boyfriend. Finally there is a boy who liked me back. I'm going to finally have my first kiss.Everything is perfect.
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